Living in Tunisia: Tantana vs. Kantaoui – My Tunisian Reality Check

Emigrating to Tunisia – Act I – the Master Plan

I always have a plan. Not just one – usually two or three, neatly stacked like a tarot deck predicting my future.

The plan for my emigration to Tunisia was (theoretically) solid:

1. Fly stylishly, “expat light.”
2. Settle in a luxury apartment in Kantaoui, with guarded gates, swaying palms, and gardeners trimming hedges into perfect geometric shapes.
3. Learn a bit of Arabic, integrate elegantly, perhaps even sip mint tea on a balcony with a sea view.
4. After a year, gently move into a “normal” neighborhood in Sousse.

That was the fantasy. Reality, as always, had other plans.

Act II – Kantaoui – Expat Fantasy vs. Housing Reality

Superficially, Kantaoui looked beautiful. The classified ad promised luxurious living, the photos were shiny, the furniture allegedly brand new.

What I got instead: great outside, terrible inside.

The building looked glamorous, but inside was a collection of broken furniture that hadn’t been new for at least ten years. Pro tip: real estate photos in Tunisia apparently are taken once every ten years and then reused indefinitely.

That was the notorious Dahmen-Immo crisis I have already complained about. I signed a lease for a property that was supposedly “less than a year old.” In reality, it was “less than a century old.” A sparkling cage full of junk.

Act III – Tantana – Everyday Life, Ants, and Grounding

So I moved to Tantana. On paper, the opposite of Kantaoui. Here it is ugly on the outside, nice on the inside.

The house itself – or rather, the ground floor that I rent – is tastefully furnished. Stylish, even elegant. For once, the pictures did not lie.

But then came the armies.

Ants so hungry they launch lightning-fast raids. You can’t even make a simple sandwich without the kitchen turning into an insect buffet. A breadcrumb on the countertop disappears faster than my dignity.

And the cockroaches. Big enough to have their own passport. One even waved at me the other evening. I almost booked a flight home immediately. Only the lack of reliable internet spared me a humiliating emergency repatriation to Switzerland.

Act IV – Expectations and Reality of Living in Tunisia

To be clear: I already knew Tunisia. Jendouba was no fairy tale. It was perfectly clear to me that, compared to Switzerland, this is a developing country.

But honestly, I thought that decades of scouting and camping would have toughened me up. Gas bottles for cooking? Cute. In Switzerland, we use those for camping trips. Here, it’s everyday life, and I just shrug.

But nothing – absolutely nothing – prepared me for the creeping reality.

Not the mosquitoes, not the stray cats, not even my old scout latrines. Ants and cockroaches have declared war on me, and unlike my camping badge collection, I won’t get a medal for surviving them.

Act V – Arriving in Tunisia – the human factor

The people in Tantana? They sit outside and watch me curiously. Not hostile, but not friendly either. They just watch me. No small talk. No ‘welcome to the neighborhood.’ Just looks. Maybe it’s the language barrier. Maybe it’s me.

In the meantime:

• No ATM in sight.
• No Mars Gold cigarettes in the local shops.
• Fish restaurants without menus.
• Carrefour refuses to even acknowledge my street unless I give instructions with frantic hand gestures from the main road.

Welcome to Tantana.

Status report

Exhausted. Overwhelmed. Slightly paranoid.

But hey – brutally exposed, genuine, and very alive.